EXPECTATIONS
Henry Miller said, “One’s destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things.” My travels in Southeast and South Asia have certainly borne that out for me. We Canadians are fortunate to live a life that can meet all our needs—and desires—as a result of our own efforts. As a result, we often tend to have high expectations of what we “should” have coming to us.
We expect our homes to have five appliances and a bedroom for every child. We expect to be warm and protected and to eat three times a day. We expect free basic education, and affordable post-secondary education. We expect to have a job that pays a good salary (for the job itself, not the work we actually do) and offers employee benefits such as medical and dental plans. We expect to dress fashionably in a manner appropriate to the elements. We expect our communities to keep us safe and secure. In fact, we expect a heck of a lot!
It’s simply not like that in many parts of the world. There are places where three meals a day is a pipe dream and homes have one room for the whole family. Education is reserved for the wealthy in some countries, and jobs depend on “who” you know rather than “what” you know. Raising one’s status can be very difficult and, in some countries, socially unacceptable or even illegal. Health issues are rampant, and dependable medical care isn’t readily available. The people who live in these areas don’t expect anything else.
What interested me was that the people didn’t seem dissatisfied with their lives. It was what they knew, they were accustomed to it, and it met their expectations. This is not to say they wouldn’t love the opportunity to live my life, but they didn’t waste their energy on pipe dreams. They invested everything they had in the life they actually live.
Which brings up the question, are we doing ourselves or our children any favours by setting our expectations so high? What if we don’t—or can’t—meet them? The world is changing, and perhaps our expectations need to change as well. While we may not always be able to get what we want, it would be nice to know we can be happy with what we get, whatever that might be.
— Lyn Policha, WJS Canada Policy Analyst